How can we make our church different from all the other churches in Post Falls? What if we put a 50-foot steeple on the south end of the church building? Would that make us different? How about installing an elevator to lift people from the foyer to the auditorium level? That might make our church unique, but would it really make us any different or better? What if like some of the college football teams, we paved our parking lot with a red or blue surface?
The Lord Jesus may have been speaking of something else, but it was certainly related to my question. Please turn to John 13:31 – After Judas had left to arrange Jesus’ betrayal, “When he was gone out, Jesus said, Now is the Son of man glorified, and God is glorified in him. If God be glorified in him, God shall also glorify him in himself, and shall straightway glorify him. Little children, yet a little while I am with you. Ye shall seek me: and as I said unto the Jews, Whither I go, ye cannot come; so now I say to you. A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.” I don’t believe the Lord will rebuke me for adding to His statement. But in addition to genuine brotherly love, there are other things which prove that we are the Lord’s disciples – that we have spiritual life. Things like sacrifice, non-conformity, transformation, and humility.
Rarely attending any other church than our church, it’s hard for me to be dogmatic about religious trends. I can read and I can listen, but that sort of information usually comes in a biased fashion, either pro or con. Nevertheless, from what I read and hear, most churches today seem more interested in their member’s feelings than they are in the Lord’s glory. When that is true in a church, there is very little expository or verse-by-verse preaching. The attention of most messages seems to turn to self-help and feeling-good, cherry picking verses out of the scriptures to prove the preacher’s latest philosophy. Intrinsically there is nothing wrong with dealing with practical issues, even as we see in Romans, but those contemporary subjects and emotional themes had better have a solid foundation in Biblical doctrine. And not every verse in the Bible is designed to make us feel better about ourselves.
Eighty-five years ago, the first, and one of the best, of all self-help books was published. Fortunately, or unfortunately, it didn’t even try to pretend to have any relationship to the Bible. “How to Win Friends and Influence People” was written by Dale Carnegy. It was first published in 1936. It has been in my library; it may still be hidden there somewhere, but I have read it only once. It was written from a humanistic point of view, and therefore there are things with which I disagree, it is still worth the time to take and read, if you are holding the Bible in your other hand. Probably its faults lay more in what it doesn’t teach than what it does.
Let me give you a quick summary of “How to Win Friends and Influence People.” Chapter one: Fundamental Techniques in Handling People. Notice that: “handling people.” Don’t complin, criticize or condemn anyone. Give honest and sincere appreciation wherever possible. Rouse in the other person an eager want. Six Ways to Make People Like You. Become genuinely interested in other people. Smile. Remember that a man’s name is to him the sweetest and most important sound in any language. Use it. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves. Talk in the terms of the other man’s interest. Make the other person feel important and do it sincerely. Twelve Ways to Win People to Your Way of Thinking. Avoid arguments. Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never tell someone they are wrong. If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically. Begin in a friendly way. Start with questions to which the other person will answer “yes.” Let the other person do the talking. Let the other person feel that your idea is really his idea. Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view. Sympathize with the other person. Appeal to noble motives. Dramatize your ideas. Throw down a challenge. How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment. Begin with praise and honest appreciation. Call attention to other people’s mistakes but do so indirectly. Talk about your own mistakes first. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders. Let the other person save face. Praise every improvement. Give them a fine reputation to live up to. Encourage them by making their faults seem easy to correct. Make the other person happy about doing what you suggest.
One of the things which Carnegy doesn’t say, is stated by Paul in this scripture. “Don’t be too full of yourself.” Perhaps this one point brings up the primary difference between secular self-help and true Biblical character. There once was a day when people use to say, “I’ve been to a Dale Carnegy class,” or “I’ve been to a Carnegy seminar.” It was said with a kind of pride, as if that was suppose to make him a better person than the next guy. Without saying so, this attitude borders on our native desire for self-exaltation. Carnegy’s book explains how to conquer other people without their realization they have been conquered. This kind of self-improvement and self-help are logical steps toward self-deification if not properly regulated And even though what Paul teaches us in verse 3 may be one of the best things that any of us could ever do to improve our relationship with others – to win friends and influence people – it involves the complete destruction of ego and pride, and in some ways stands in contrast to the general theme of Carnegy’s book. Christianity does not need more humanistic logic and worldly psycho-babble. There is already far too much Hollywood theatrics and Madison Avenue sales techniques. We need more of God’s word – we need the application of God’s Word.
You see, we all have a potentially serious PROBLEM.
Even as Christians, we are sinners. Our Adamic nature, our sin-nature, remains within us and will be with us until the Lord glorifies us. We have a propensity to sin – we have an innate inclination – an inborn leaning towards sin. Yes, saints of God are sinners who have been forgiven, and who have been given a hatred toward sin, but they are people who still must struggle against this propensity throughout their earthly lives. This native sinfulness expresses itself in a multitude of ways according our various personalities. Some people are quick to loose their tempers, while others are quick to loose their faith and confidence. Some people couldn’t trust an angel of God, but other so gullible they’d believe anything from anybody. Some people live far too much in the world, as Paul seems to suggest in verse 1, but others, as some say, are so “heavenly-minded that they are no earthly good.” I could run down a long list, and if I haven’t gotten to you and your personal sin, I certainly could in a matter of a minute or so.
In this verse Paul attacks one such Christian sin – pride. “For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.” From what I am told, the English language cannot adequately express the complicated play on words which Paul put into this verse. Putting it as simply as possible, he exhorts us “not to be high-minded above what we ought to be minded, but so to be minded as to be sober-minded.” If you didn’t get that, don’t worry about it, I’ll come back to it in a minute or two.
David, the son of Jesse, the second king of Israel, was a sinner like all the rest of us. And he had to fight against his sin-nature and many specific sins throughout his life. For example, he was guilty of the abuse of power, pride, murder, and a propensity toward adultery. But he was also one of God’s elect – both saved from his sin and chosen by God to a very special office. In that, David, and his predecessor Saul were both elected to the same office, each winning by one vote – God’s vote – it means that in some ways David and Saul can be compared. But even though David was not completely victorious in living these principles, Saul was a complete failure. You and I might be tempted to compare Saul and David, but David, during his life-time didn’t need to do that.
What Paul says is: “Don’t measure your value with things that essentially have no value.” Let’s say that I emptied my Monopoly game box of all of its play money, and then I went to a car dealer telling him that I want to pay cash for a new car. He would laugh me off his lot. I know that many people think there is little difference between Monopoly money and Federal Reserve notes, but until the government and the economy pull the plug, practically speaking there is a difference. Trying to claim to be wealthy by flashing a bunch of Monopoly money is not much different than trying to say that we are better than the next person because our hair is darker or our feet are smaller. Some people think of themselves more highly than they ought to think because they have more talent for this or that. Here is someone who has some musical ability, does that make him better than the person who can’t sing a note, but who can speed-read with complete understanding and retention? That second person will probably argue that he is the better. Here is someone who can do complicated math in his head, but he hasn’t a clue how to be a friend. And here is another with a big house and a huge bank account – does that make him important? David was a king, but did that in itself make him a better person than Eliab, his brother? I personally like to use unfamiliar words, because they are fun, and I like to stretch my own vocabulary. But that doesn’t make me any smarter than the person who says the same thing with simpler words. In fact, that other person may be a more effective communicator than I am, because people understand him better. The way that we compare ourselves, and boost our self-image, is the way the unsaved behave generally. It is the way that the world behaves; it is a very worldly thing to do. And the way of the world is not supposed to be the way of the citizen of heaven. Certainly, there is nothing wrong in excelling in things, but it is sinful to think that those areas of excellence make us better than others. Only the Lord can make us truly better people.
Notice that verse 3 begins with the conjunction “for.” It means that the message of this verse is an amplification or explanation of the previous thought. And the previous thought was: “be not conformed to this world, but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind.” As I say, this business of comparing ourselves to others with the purpose of self-inflation is worldly and sinful. As Christians it is our obligation to try think as the Lord thinks, at least as far as our native limits permit. We are to have renewed minds, according to God’s pattern.
At this point, I need to flip the coin over to consider its other side. Do you remember how I paraphrased Paul’s exhortation? “Don’t be high-minded above what you ought to be minded, but be minded with a sober-mind.” Simply put, don’t think more highly of yourself than you ought to think. But don’t go to the other extreme either and pretend that you are less than what you really are. Just because you don’t know the definition of “pulchritude” doesn’t mean you are stupid. Turning to Paul’s context and looking a little closer, let’s say that the Lord is calling some young man into the ministry, but he decides that because he doesn’t know or use Brother Oldfield’s fancy words, it must mean that he’s unqualified to preach the gospel? Not so. It appears that Paul wasn’t the orator Apollos was. Let’s not compare apples with oranges. Some people turn what Paul is saying inside out and upside down, in order to make excuses for themselves. We are commanded not to think more highly than we ought to think, but at the same time, what we ought to think, we ought to think.
And perhaps that brings us to the SOLUTION to this problem.
“For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.” There is nothing wrong with understanding what our strengths and weaknesses are. In fact that is a very, very good exercise, if done properly. And part of this proper exercise is to repeat it from time to time, because our strengths and weaknesses are in constant flux. I might be a mediocre musician, but that doesn’t mean that I couldn’t strengthen that area of my life. I might be financially rich today and somewhat independent, but tomorrow, my strength may be in trusting the Lord, because my wealth has been stripped away. Today, I might have perfect health, but God may say that I am more useful to Him with broken health. I need to constantly re-evaluate, or re-think myself, in the most sober way possible, for the glory of God.
Paul uses the word “soberly” in this verse. In the English language, what is the oppose condition to “soberness” or “sobriety”? Generally speaking, a sober person is not “drunken,” and a drunk is not sober. There is more to the word than that, but this is undoubtedly true. In Greek this word refers to a “soundness of mind.” Someone drunken with alcohol may think that he is smart and even sober, but he is not. The reason that drunk drivers are so dangerous is because they are incapable of reacting wisely and quickly to the problems of the road. But this is only one area where their minds are not what they ought to be. For example, from what I understand alcohol is involved in the vast majority of violent crime. And the various forms of immorality and immodesty are often fueled by alcohol. And alcohol abuse is the cause of several major diseases – organ failures. So this kind of drunken behavior is therefore irrational. Similarly, the man, especially the Christian man, who thinks more highly than he ought to think is irrational. He is inebriated – drunken – with pride over some aspect of his position or character. And as a drunk he is unfit and incapable of serving God properly. The solution to this problem of misjudgment and bad judgment is to think about ourselves objectively – wisely, prudently and modestly.
And this brings us back to the Lord Himself. Why was David made the king of Israel, replacing Saul? Besides whatever we might see in David and say about David, he was king due to the election of God. Earlier, after Saul took the throne, we see his heart swelling with pride until it exploded in the puss of sinful corruption. But when David became king, for the most part he sawe himself as nothing more than a man God blessed. Similarly, there is no logic in which I can boast of my salvation and deliverance from sin. It is excluded. There is nothing good which I possess in my hand, in my head, or in my heart which has not been given to me by the Lord. When I look at myself soberly, without the drunkenness of pride, I realize I am just a sinner saved by grace. Of course, it does mean that I am a saint of God, but it is to God that all praise must be given.
Do you suppose that Paul was ever tempted to think of himself as bigger than his acquaintance, Apollos? They were both preachers of the gospel, servants of God, but only one was an apostle. I Corinthians 3:1 – “And I, brethren, could not speak unto you as unto spiritual, but as unto carnal, even as unto babes in Christ. I have fed you with milk, and not with meat: for hitherto ye were not able to bear it, neither yet now are ye able. For ye are yet carnal: for whereas there is among you envying, and strife, and divisions, are ye not carnal, and walk as men? For while one saith, I am of Paul; and another, I am of Apollos; are ye not carnal? Who then is Paul, and who is Apollos, but ministers by whom ye believed, even as the Lord gave to every man?”
Then in I Corinthians 4 we read: “Let a man so account of us, as of the ministers of Christ, and stewards of the mysteries of God. Moreover it is required in stewards, that a man be found faithful. But with me it is a very small thing that I should be judged of you, or of man’s judgment: yea, I judge not mine own self. For I know nothing by myself; yet am I not hereby justified: but he that judgeth me is the Lord. Therefore judge nothing before the time, until the Lord come, who both will bring to light the hidden things of darkness, and will make manifest the counsels of the hearts: and then shall every man have praise of God. And these things, brethren, I have in a figure transferred to myself and to Apollos for your sakes; that ye might learn in us not to think of men above that which is written, that no one of you be puffed up for one against another. For who maketh thee to differ from another? and what hast thou that thou didst not receive? now if thou didst receive it, why dost thou glory, as if thou hadst not received it?” We have nothing in which to boast, except in those things which God has given to us. And if they have been given to us, then there is still nothing in which WE can boast. All that we can properly do is praise the Lord.
Paul teaches us that the yard-stick by which we measure ourselves must be the same as the Lord’s. And that takes us into the wonderful subject of “faith” to which Paul refers. “Think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.” Between those verses which we read from I Corinthians 3 and 4 we are taken to the Judgment Seat of Christ. “For other foundation can no man lay than that is laid, which is Jesus Christ. Now if any man build upon this foundation gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, stubble; Every man’s work shall be made manifest: for the day shall declare it, because it shall be revealed by fire; and the fire shall try every man’s work of what sort it is. If any man’s work abide which he hath built thereupon, he shall receive a reward. If any man’s work shall be burned, he shall suffer loss: but he himself shall be saved; yet so as by fire.” What is the difference between works of wood, hay and stubble and those of gold silver and precious stones? Among several important differences is the faith with which they are performed. “Whatsoever is not of faith is sin.” What is the criteria to be used in our sober estimation of ourselves? “The measure of our faith.” Preaching the gospel can be done in faith or without faith, and eloquence has nothing to do with God’s judgment of that preaching. We can play the piano for the glory of God and in faith, or we can do it for personal pleasure and for the applause of others. We can listen to the preaching of God’s Word in faith, or we can listen in the flesh with criticism.
And what is the source of this faith? The Bible clearly says that God is the author and source of faith. “According as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.” Even for those who have new hearts – regenerated hearts – faith is still a gift from God. So if we had a faith-tester, a lens through which we could look at every servant of God to measure that person’s faith, even for those with great faith, the praise could not properly be given to him, because he was only the recipient of God’s gift. The Lord is the source of anything and everything which is good in this world.
And similarly, God is the One in Whom it all begins. David, Paul, you and I were all born dead – dead in trespasses and sins. We had no more right to boast in anything than an ant can boast in the existence of the moon. But then along came the infinite grace of God – in exposing our sins and presenting to us the gospel. And even those things were nothing until the Lord dealt to us some measure of faith to believe. Salvation belongeth unto the Lord from beginning to end, and all praise belongs to Him. But even after that, if we are in anyway useful in His service, the praise is still His. We are nothing except “according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.”
The sort of things which should make us different from the world are all effects of our faith in the Lord. That which we need to make our church different from the other churches in town are sacrifice, spiritual transformation, humility and sobriety – all gifts of God’s grace. The Lord wants us to stand out from the crowd – not in a negative way, but positively and joyfully. Therefore – “Be ye followers of God as dear children.”